Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Kansas City trades SS Angel Berroa for Half Eaten Candy Bar

The Kansas City Royals pulled off what could be a steal on Saturday, as they traded their former American League Rookie of the Year Shortstop for a partially consumed Snickers bar.

"I was meeting with Ned Colletti via video conference, and it looked like he was done with it," Royals general manager Dayton Moore said. "I asked him if he was interested in maintaining the services of his candy, and he told us we could obtain it for the right price."

"Yeah, I'd had kind of a larger dinner, some Chicken Marsala and parmesean encrusted mashed potatoes, and I think I was more eating it out of stress about how to find more outfielders," Dodgers GM Colletti said. "But don't get me wrong, I could have been hungry later, and I would have been happy to have kept the Snickers in the organization. But Berroa also serves a need, I suppose."

Berroa, a notorious no contact, no power, no discipline, no field shortstop who Hideki Matsui gets teased for losing Rookie of the Year to, was mired in Omaha, Kansas City's Triple A affiliate.

Berroa, left, shows off his ROY-defensive abilities

"Obviously, we had to weigh the pros and cons of the situation," Dayton Moore continued. "In the end, all our scouts and baseball people agreed we would receive more out of the candy bar, I mean, it looked really good. Hardly any debris on it, clean breaks and everything."

To avoid mailing delays, the candy bar was to be delivered in person by the next unlucky person to walk into Ned Colletti's office, which turned out to be shortstop Juan Rivera, who is hitting .217/.250/.304 in Single A.

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