Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Royals Show Solidarity for Struggling Teammate Tony Pena Jr. by Going Hitless

In a show of support for struggling Kansas City Royals shortstop Tony Pena Jr., the team held a surprise hitless bash on Monday, May 19th, with every player getting zero hits on the day.

"It felt really good," Tony Pena said via telephone interview from his hotel room. "Guys say they know what you're going through, what it's like to never have to be on base and spend all that extra time sitting on the dugout bench. It's just nice to not be alone there. To be fair, it's not like we were all Kevin Youkilis or Albert Pujols two days ago."

Pena's batting line currently sits at .169/.194/.218, by far the worst among major league regulars. Combining a lack of contact ability, plate discipline, and the power of a little leaguer is not easy. And teammates are going to have a hard time relating unless they try it themselves.

"I couldn't be prouder of our boys," manager Trey Hillman said in the postgame interview. "Everyone got to spend some time with Tony on the bench between innings and show that they too were capable of piles of meaningless outs. We have a saying around here - the chain is only as strong as it's weakest link. And boy, did that chain look weak today."

Every batter posted a perfect .000/.000/.000 line except for lone wolf sluggers Billy Butler and Esteban German, who each insisted on padding their stats by drawing a walk. "We'll have a heart to heart with those guys tomorrow," Hillman said. "They have to realize that this can't always be about them. Tonight was about Tony, and there's nothing about drawing a walk that Tony can relate to. It's just a selfish, results-based plate approach that will alienate their teammates and cause friction down the road that will prevent us from playing as a team."

The Royals lost the game 7-0.


  1. not to be an insensitive jerk or anything, but does anybody else think its ridiculous how much Lester was celebrating on the mound and showing up the royals?

    or are we only allowed to call out non-white players like Joba? Maybe its the cancer thing.

    OORRR maybe it's neither and the media scrutinizes stuff when they're bored.

  2. Now I know what the bad side of blogging looks like. No wonder bloggers get little respect.

  3. Now I KNOW we're doing something right.

  4. Kansas City will be getting a taste of Red Sox' Colon tonight.

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